We need to take these lessons from that brilliant strategist, John Paul-ass.
1. Write a story, with help, or steal it from fanfic, about your imaginary tryst with a celebrity. Pick a day when you are sure the celebrity will not be visible to the world. After all, you don’t want to be caught with your bare ass hanging out and the whole world laughing at you.
2. Take your story to the tabloids. No need to worry about truth in the media. The tabloids know how to publish bullcrap without getting sued. All they have to do is sprinkle the words “alleged” and “the source claims”, and you have removed the blame and can’t be held responsible. If the source is a nut job, so much the better!
3. After the story runs in the tabloids, you have probably convinced the not-to-logical that the story is real. So, if you are smart, you sit back on your (well used and reamed) laurels. However, if you are John Paul-ass, and you are not very smart, you don’t do this
4. Go on every blog-site, shock jock radio show, and third rate interview that likes dirty stories, regardless of reality, and repeat your story, with all new frills each time. Make sure you add such things as different height for the person you met, time to the second when you were ordered to perform, a maintenance man that just appeared after you needed confirmation, and other on-the-spot details.
5. Start your own blog so you can continue to repeat your story over and over again, adding new details each time. Gather a group of ultra-gullible sycophants who will tell you how marvelous you are, even when your stories are getting crazier and crazier.
6. Tell your ultra-gullible sycophants that you are now having regular conversations with the celebrity that you tried to use for your instant fame as a porn star. The fact that only an idiot would believe this is not a problem for this group. They will believe ANYTHING.
7. Tell your ultra-gullible sycophants that all you ever wanted was an apology, and now the object of your smear campaign has apologized, so you are closing your blog. There does not seem to be any logic for this, since the object of the smear campaign has released his album, told the world the story was bullshit, and continued to ignore you, but this group will believe ANYTHING.
8. Reopen your blog. Admit to your ultra-gullible sycophants that you lied about the whole story. Next, change your mind and claim that you lied about the lie. It will not matter at all, this group will believe ANYTHING.
9. Admit, on your internet blog, that you are stalking the celebrity target of your smear campaign. After all, you are still trying to meet him, so if it takes criminal activity to do it, go for it!
10. Tell your ultra-gullible sycophants that friends and fans of the object of your smear campaign are in a secret club and communicating with the celebrity. Tell your ultra-gullible sycophants that these friends and fans in the secret club are then passing the information on to you. They will not remember, or will ignore the fact that you claimed you were in communication with the celebrity. The only people who will remember it, and all of the other crazy things you’ve said for 17 months, are the sane people who are laughing at you.
If you want to go over the top to step 11, you tell your ultra-gullible sycophants that you also had an affair with an A-list celebrity, and hint that it was George Cloony. Don’t worry that no one in their right mind would believe that GC would look at you, especially for two months. Your ultra-gullible sycophants will believe anything.
Written by a Clay Fan who will remain anonymous
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41 comments:
you forgot to mention post your pictures from 20 years ago on every possible place you can so that you can get the most (snort) exposure (snort bwah) even if you don't look like that at all anymore. and as a useful tip, when you post pictures of your target celeb, make sure they are actually a picture of that celeb, a mistake like posting a different celeb will compromise the scam.....but the psycho-idiots will still believe.
Here's another one for the list -
After telling and retelling the same story (only not) for over a year and a half, make sure you decide to blog all the rest of the details, the inside scoop, the "ins and outs" if you will, in hopes that anyone will care.
Oh and don't forget to play the victim again with anyone and everyone you met or were paid to have sex with in the end - pun intended.
One more -
Tell your readers you were tops in your Special Forces class because you never gave in to the highly trained instructors, but then you "accidentally" starred in a porn flick because you were confused and nervous.
Makes sense to me - LOL.
You can add another one to the list:
Make ridiculous claims about how small Clay is in certain areas but prior to that everyone else including Clay's ex-girlfriends, yes I said girlfriends, say the absolute opposite. Also pick a day Jan 2, 2006 to tell the lie and Clay has 125 witnesses including photos of himself in the audience in New York City Broadway on that very day.
REAL Smart, NOT!!!!
However, we must allow that said idiot's IQ is congruent with his Lilliputian stature.
Can we add another one? If the stalker doesn't seem to have enough new material for the ultra-gullible sycophants, then they will help him out by embellishing and adding new facts of fiction which all the the other ultra-gullible sycophants will fully believe.
Ooohh, I have another one --
And if your supply of ultra-gullible sycophants seem to be dwindling in number, why just invent some NEW imaginary 'friends' to have your blog conversations with...it's not too difficult when you're certifiable to begin with! (My guess is Borderline Personality Disorder with narcissistic, bipolar, and schizophrenic tendencies.)
(PS - Has anyone ever verified that this wussy was actually ever, technically, a "Green Beret?" I believe that about as much as I believe any of the other voices in his head. Military, yeah. Green Beret, no)
How about this one. Explain to your followers that it's not boredom with your rehashed and recycled tall tale that is responsible for our ignoring it but that it's because we now believe your lies. They believe every other tale you tell, they will certainly believe that too.
Silly fools.
First of all, will the real JP please stand up!
Oh? He's passed out under the desk, you say? Pity...
He should try rehab...
Of course, you must have just misspoken when you said you were let go from your ReMax job on February 2nd because the fans were harassing you. First of all, why were you let go because of the fans? Wouldn't you have just quit instead? After all, you had already decided to do porn. Oh, I get it. You needed a reason not to be accused of being a sleazy opportunist so you had to blame the fans for your decision to do porn.
But you misspoke. These things happen, particularly when you were embarking on a career that you said you had always harbored a secret desire to do. I'm sure smearing Clay's name everywhere had nothing to do with it. I'm sure the fact that you mentioned Clay's name to Lucas after he told you to go the audition route was merely an offhand remark, not intended to move you to the head of the line, which it did. Apparently, Lucas was more interested in Clay than he was in you.
But again, you misspoke. So easy to do. You really need to get your stories straight, because you were actually let go the morning of Jan. 25th when superiors at ReMax in a higher office saw the NE story, saw your nude photos online and let you go because they felt given your poor decisions regarding your personal life and your obvious inability to be trusted, you were bad for business. I'm sure you just forgot that on Feb. 2nd, you were in NYC getting your ass waxed for your closeup.
So sweet of you to give up your alleged $17,000 commission because of the ReMax families. Are you sure it wasn't $170 because you only had a few lower end properties which had been on the market several months and weren't moving. Must have been a typo. In all your excitement in moving on to be the next big porn star, you must have knocked up a few zeroes there.
BTW, you can move your license to another broker any time you want. Realtors are independent contractors in NC and can't be fired. You were the one who chose to sit on your ass all that time. But in all your excitement about being a pseudo celebrity, that little fact must have escaped you. Or perhaps you felt bigger and better things were coming your way.
So many things you forgot to mention. Can't wait for the George Clooney story. We're sure he can't wait either.
Don't forget to mention your 6-hour e-mail interview with a writer in which you mentioned that the DNA evidence was manufactured by the NE. That interview is now in the hands of investigators.
Something else in the hands of investigators is the QI's nightly towel report. Oh, you didn't know about that? Yes, it seems the maids do count the towels, washcloths, linens, etc. in each room after the guests check out and there were no towels, washcloths, linens, etc. reported missing from Room 207 on the night of January 2nd. That report was handed in on the morning of January 3rd and it is also in the hands of investigators.
Of course, you probably didn't realize that falsifying evidence is a crime. Putting it up on e-bay would also be considered criminal, as in fraud. In NC, the statute of limitations for fraud is 3 years. Of course, impersonating someone on the internet is a crime as is doctoring up a profile for that person and starting fraudulent accounts in their name in order to spread false rumors on certain websites. Accepting money or perks from others while taking part in a scam to ruin someone's career and livelihood could be considered criminal conspiracy and/or racketeering. Certain gay websites understand this, which is why they're cooperative in handing over certain account numbers to investigators. Sprint understands this also, which is why all it takes is a little old subpoena to unblock certain cell phone numbers to see if certain callers match up with certain online identities.
To summarize, conducting a 17-month fraud is just not cool. It could get you in trouble. The kind of trouble declaring bankruptcy again won't fix. Someone probably just forgot to mention that to you.
"Realtors are independent contractors in NC and can't be fired."
Never let facts get in the way of a good story.
Nice zingers. I love it!
You all rock!!
I can only add, JP get professional help or at the very least medication.
I had so much fun reading that blog. We have gotten to know these minions so well, they don't really have a clue as to how they are perceived anymore. The more they yammer the more stupid they seem. The weekend's making fun of Clay's trip to Canada
is just one example of the spin they put to things, and it just doesn't matter anymore.
Ya know. After all these years and they still haven't been able to bring Clay down...give it up already.
I hear that JP is claiming Clay told his friends and certain BAF members at the Gala that everything JP said about their little rendezvous is true and that if you ask Clay about it in a M&G, he'll tell you the truth but only one on one. Of course, JP knows that Clay is never alone in a M&G with fans so he knows that no one will ask and if they do, Clay will just give them a dirty look or make a sarcastic remark.
JP wants everyone to believe his tall tale is true, that Clay has sworn these individuals to secrecy and that they must not tell each other. Yet he would have us believe they all go running to JP claiming Clay told them that JP was telling the truth. Does this make any sense to anyone who is capable of rational thought? I didn't think so. It's ludicrous. It never happened. Of course, the vermin that inhabit that blog and hang on his every word believe it because they are nuts. GJ&C and the OC are addicted to gay porn and slashfic and hang around because they think the story is hot, even if it's just another fable JP farted out of his ass. The rest are haters who are trying to destroy Clay's career and they are the usual suspects, the mentally deranged lunatics from KCE and Soulful Sistahs.
For JP himself, he clings to his tall tale like it's a lifeline. As if his little fantasy tryst makes him special somehow and he must keep convincing people that it happened. In addition to all his other psychological problems, he suffers from low self esteem and delusions of grandeur. His sister once referred to him as an obsessed celebrity stalker and that the whole family is dysfunctional. Ya got that right, sistah!
"First of all, will the real JP please stand up!"
If he could have "stood up" he'd be too busy making porn movies to be stuck behind his keyboard rehashing the same lies over and over and over.
I know about JP's claim of secret circle of fans that Clay confides in. Sue had a 5 minute meet and greet where she stood in line 4.5 of those minutes and Clay wouldn't even remember her. Add to that a couple of stalkers that he had no choice but to discourage and then a couple of nuts from the Cafe whose names and faces he wouldn't remember either.
Most of those people are over on the hate blogs putting Clay's fans down by calling us old and fat. Those are the gals in their mid 40's to late 50's and not only do they have big asses but they have both back and front asses. I've seen their pics but please don't confuse the front and back asses with their faces. Give 'em a break.
When I first read this blog and the responses especially from anonymous at 10:36 and 11:47, I was laughing. Now I am very angry. I knew Clay was innocent from the very beginning. It seems there is ample proof that could shut the mouths of JP and his swamp rats and put them away for a while. I find that very appealing. I wonder why it has ot been done. If a lie is told often enough, people will believe it.
Let's not forget that the idiot was a Green Beret who is so weak and gullible himself that anyone can force him to do as they demand, force him to take drugs just by asking, have him present his ass for reaming just by inviting him for an interview, and chase him out of his job just by telling him to leave and leave his commissions behind.
Then the idiot goes on to say that he is so weak because all of his training was in attack, nothing on defense. I really hope they gave this cowardly freak a suicide pill because if he was captured, he would be leading the enemy right back to our gates, and begging them to be nice to him.
OK, this is just too funny! This was posted on the dumbass 411 blog:
I Agree! Guess we won't find out until Aiken's "mouth piece" gets permission to tell what is going on with him. Isn't it funny how, after all these months, Aiken seems to be confiding in the one person that was hell bent on bringing him down?? Need Aiken wonder why the better part of his fan base said "ta hell with ya" and left.
Everything about Aiken is one screwed up mess & really needs to be gone & forgotten.
Niters!
D | 06.02.07 - 1:43 am | #
This bunch has got to be just as dumb as JP's band of moron's if they actually believe Clay is talking to the asswipe! OMG, I hope they never have to take an IQ test, the scores don't register that low!
Holy Crap!! Did anyone see the latest blog????
Boy, or boy! What a great summer this is gonna be! Ha! Even Clay is waiting for JP's stunning appearance. He even seems to be looking forward to it. I wonder what he has in store for him?? I just love surprises!!
Let's see JP get out of this one!! LOL!!
Holy Crap!! Did anyone see the latest blog????
Boy, or boy! What a great summer this is gonna be! Ha! Even Clay is waiting for JP's stunning appearance. He even seems to be looking forward to it. I wonder what he has in store for him?? I just love surprises!!
Let's see JP get out of this one!! LOL!!
Who's blog? Clay's or Butt Pluggs? I am not clear on what you are talking about, can you help out?
PaulASS claims the QI doesn't count the towels. Yes, they do! The maids count the towels every day when they clean the rooms. Room 207 had no towels/washcloths missing from the night of January 2nd and that report was handed in after the rooms were cleaned on January 3rd. The manager gave a statement to investigators.
Holy Crap!! Did anyone see the latest blog????
Clay's blog entitled: "My rebound relationship!"
PS - JP took the bait! LOL!!
PaulASS claims the QI doesn't count the towels. Yes, they do! The maids count the towels every day when they clean the rooms.
------
As a former hotel owner, I can tell you this is true. Each "size" room is allocated, by occupancy, for a certain amount of towels. If extras are needed, such as the addition of a rollaway, then it is charted. At check out when the dirty ones are picked up and replaced with clean ones, if any are missing it is charted on the clip board that every maid's cart carries. Any other items missing from the room is also charted.
Linens are the first to disappear, in situations with children and wet bathing suits, etc. It's up to the individual hotel whether to charge back the customer, who should have left a credit card # on record, which is required at check in. What if they destroyed the room? Charging the customer for linens isn't always done, but a record is kept. It's part of inventory control.
JP posted the blog????
LOL.
What a dumbass.
You know what they say? Dumber than a box of rocks! People will read that and get that Clay is laughing at the swamps efforts to just keep making up shit to con people so they can keep things going hoping for another 15 minutes. As JP says and as he said in the tabloid story he made up for the Star......."Duh!"
I thought it was funny that Clay's Blog says , his new relationship (TV show) then he says he fond Her on iTunes......Hmmm, that was perfect.
I only have one word Dumbass
It might time to come up with a Top 10 list for why buttplug doesn't show up at the concert in Cary in the 4th row.
I can see it now - Either mumsy will suddenly be ill or he will blame Claymates for sending threats.
Anyone want to place bets?
Anyone want to place bets?
That would be a sucker bet. That snivelling coward would never show his face at that concert. How would he explain to his minions why his "good buddy" Clay had him thrown out on his well-worn ass?
Notice how he never posts his actual seat number. How would he explain it when someone else with that exact same seat number proved him to be a fraud?
The Stalker keeps this crap up simply to jerk people's chains. I just presume every syllable out of his mouth is a lie; therefore, he has no power over me at all.
I thought it was funny that Clay's Blog says , his new relationship (TV show) then he says he fond Her on iTunes......Hmmm, that was perfect.
4:52 PM
Yes this is just too perfect to be coincidence. BWAH
Ugh! The latest picture at the swamp of the pickle and pal...I threw up a little in my mouth.
Ugh! The latest picture at the swamp of the pickle and pal...I threw up a little in my mouth.
Is that who was in the picture? I thought it was a pair of used up old male prostitutes!...
Oh,...wait.......
Is that who was in the picture? I thought it was a pair of used up old male prostitutes!...
Oh,...wait.......
Coffee does not feel so good coming through my nose! LOL!!
Top ten reason's JP won't attend the Cary concert...
#10 He won't have the guts.
#9 His dog will go into labor...never mind the dog is male.
#8 His mom will get sick after she realizes she doesn't have anything new to wear.
#7 His best friend, Clay, messaged him and asked that he not attend.
#6 He received threatening emails from Clay fans (that he wrote to himself).
#5 His computer was hacked by Clayfans.
#4 He saw a picture of Jerome.
#3 He never said he was going. It was someone else posting under his name.
#2 Newspaper reporter and camera crew cancelled at the last minute.
And the #1 all time best reason JP won't attend the concert in Cary is.....
#1 He found a new boyfriend!
#7 His best friend, Clay, messaged him and asked that he not attend.
Yup he'll say Clay felt concerned for his safety and asked him not to come....SNicker, JP is a certified stalker and he knows He wouldn't get anywhere near Clay that day. And his fans know it too. I'm willing to bet security will be very present there that day.
Top 10 reasons he won't show up
10. He was threatened by Clayfans.
9. He was harassed by Clay fans.
8. He was bullied by Clay fans.
7. He was intimidated by Clay fans.
6. He was tormented by Clay fans.
5. He was terrorized by Clay fans.
4. He was menaced by Clay fans.
3. He was persecuted by Clay fans.
2. He was teased by Clay fans.
And the #1 reason -
He saw the sign at the venue that says:
"NO SHIRT - NO ENTRY"
LOL!
Here's a reason:
Clay's fans called his place of employment and got him fired.
Oops, sorry, he doesn't have a job does he?
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